


I'm Drunk, I Love You

by stellarwrites



Category: Winner (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Fluff, Friendship, Happily Ever After Ending, I SWEAR on KSY’s new biceps and Mino’s lovely thighs, IDILY movie, I’m updating the tags because self care comes first, M/M, Roadtrip, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-30
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:14:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24454255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellarwrites/pseuds/stellarwrites
Summary: Mino has been in love with his best friend, Seungyoon, for four years. Near graduation, they go on an unexpected road trip for a weekend. Will Mino finally have the courage to risk their friendship once and for all?
Relationships: Kang Seungyoon/Song Minho | Mino
Comments: 16
Kudos: 36





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, this is my take on MINYOON set in the IDILY Universe! If you are familiar with the story, I'm sure you can figure out which (memorable) characters and (iconic) scenes I've taken. 
> 
> You can watch the entire movie [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SiZ1hDkjrno)! It has English subs. 
> 
> But do keep in mind that I've taken the liberty of adding and subtracting scenes/plotlines, so there may be some unexpected twists on how everything pans out. ;)
> 
> If you are not familiar with the movie, it's okay. I've tried my best to write it as a stand-alone story and meant to be understandable (and hopefully enjoyable!) independent of the original movie.
> 
> This is my first MINYOON fic! As I've said to many friends, I'm very intimidated to write these two as their relationship is very dear to me. However, I'll try my best to write them well using my limited skills. Enjoy!

****

**Prologue**

Like most artists, Song Mino keeps a sketch pad. While other guys have their own little black book, Mino has a different kind.

He had always kept a sketchbook with him since he was ten. He had started with his old cat, Elvis, sketching her round, drowsy figure perched on the windowsill of their family's kitchen. Soon he progressed to his sister (much to her annoyance), his mother (who told him he'd be the next Picasso), and his father (who gave him an indulgent smile and went back to work). 

Mino's black book isn't just a way to record his progress, but eventually, it became a way to intimate his deepest thoughts and desires. Instead of self-implosion, he spilled his feelings to the 200 gsm paper, fashioned from acrylic paint and Mino's frustrations.

His sketchbook had been a harmless way to explore ideas that he wouldn't even entertain in the light of day. He could experiment in any way he wanted, without judgment or condescension. No pressure to get it perfect. 

His sketchbook had always been a way to slowly discover what techniques made his soul sing, what kind of man he could become.

At fifteen, his grade-school art teacher had elected to talk to his parents about Mino's promising potential to become a serious artist. Would they consider enrolling Mino in an arts-focused university? That night, Mino had to pop on his cheap headphones to drown his parents' passionate argument about his future. 

In the end, the choice had been given to him, and Mino had weighed his parents' cautious support and the weighty expectations he had on himself. 

Mino had ended up enrolling in the Seoul Institute of the Arts, and the first friend he'd met was the lithe and delicate-looking Kang Seungyoon.

In many ways, this is really where Mino's life had really started.

  
  
  



	2. Part One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mino has been in love with his best friend, Seungyoon, for four years.
> 
> Near graduation, they go on an unexpected road trip for a weekend. Will Mino finally have the courage to risk their friendship once and for all?

**Part One**

  


_Every night when I put a fight with myself_

_I tried to remember how_

_To shove your thoughts away_

_And forget happy days with you_

  
  


**Thursday, 8:03 PM.**

  


It's another one of those nights.

When Mino sketches Kang Seungyoon, he always ends up starting with his hands. Long, fine-boned, pink. Always dry, chapped, in need of good hand cream. He had calluses on all of his fingertips because of his long-time love affair with the guitar. Seungyoon calls it his "mistress." Because the real love of his life had always been film photography. 

Song Mino being keenly aware of Kang Seungyoon's finger calluses are just one of the many weaknesses he had cataloged over the years. Four years, to be exact.

That night, the cafe is stuffy and a tad hot. It's a good turnout for a Thursday music gig. Mino lounges alone on a wrought-iron table, nursing tepid craft beer. His sketchbook is open in front of him, almost done with the black and white sketch: an image of Kang Seungyoon crooning a fan-favorite John Mayer song on his weathered guitar. 

Your body is a wonderland, he sings.

Mino sighs. He bets it is.

The small but packed crowd is all aflutter with his performance. His buttery voice suits the song, and if Mino is honest, Seungyoon could make a real living out of being a singer. But he had dismissed the thought and said singing was only for fun.

Yes, Kang Seungyoon does a lot of things for fun. Mino had learned this in different ways, several times at the cost of his peace, right before he sleeps at night.

The music set finally ends. Seungyoon gives the guitar to the stage manager, and he makes his way to Mino's table, a silly grin on his face.

"You made it." He gives a clap to Mino's back.

"Of course," Mino snapped the sketchbook closed and clinked his bottle to his. "What are friends for?"

What for, indeed.

  


**Friday, 3:34 AM.**

  


They end up hanging out at a girl's apartment. She's a familiar face among Seungyoon's regular crowd, and Mino supposes that he has seen the last of the most recent girl he met a month ago.

She's pretty and charming, and Seungyoon hangs on to her every word like she hung the moon. Mino finds her voice a bit too nasal, and her laugh too high-pitched. And to be honest, she really isn't that hilarious—it certainly doesn't merit Seungyoon's hysterical laughter, his chin dimple saying hello to Mino, mocking him. Maybe Seungyoon's drunker than Mino surmises, or perhaps he is. His thoughts have certainly gone in a more morose direction at this moment. He needs a smoke.

Mino excuses himself and exits the girl's basically-decorated living room. He hasn't closed the door yet when they begin giggling, Seungyoon's voice decidedly becomes darker and more modulated. Soon, the laughter dies away. Different kinds of sounds began, and Mino shuts the door firmly behind him. Usually, it's okay. Yes, this is routine. His feelings about this should come expected too.

Only tonight...

Mino doesn't stop at the smoking area of the residential building. He hails a passing cab and gives the only address that he could think of right now.

Woo Jiho opens the door of his newly-renovated two-bedroom unit to Song Mino's flushed face. He almost falls down to his carpet, if Jiho hadn't had the reflex to catch him.

" _Hyung_." Mino slurs.

Jiho checks his phone's calendar and mentally remarks: Ahh, of course, it's Thursday.

He half-carries Mino to his freshly-upholstered couch, fervently hoping that his poor friend won't vomit. Mino's not entirely off his face, but he's upset, more than usual.

"What happened?"

"Hyung..." Mino groans again, his eyes closed, hands still on an unlit cigarette. Jiho plucks the stick from Mino's fingers. "Kang Seungyoon, he..."

Jiho couldn't make out the rest of his slurring. Well, not that he needs to. He already knows. 

Kang Seungyoon. Isn't it always about Kang Seungyoon?

  
  


**FRIDAY, 11:01 AM**

  


The university's cavernous main hall is abuzz with students and staff carrying various materials, supplies, and construction materials for each student exhibit.

Song Mino studies a group of paintings in front of him, confused about the best way to display them. Someone pats him on his back. Mino glances to his side and sees Pyo Ji-hoon, looking haggard as fuck.

He wastes no time telling him this. "You look like shit, man."

"Fuck you, I already knew that." Pyo runs his hand on his hair tiredly. "How's your thesis going?"

Mino shrugs and gestures to the almost-finished state of his exhibit. "It's opening on Sunday no matter how it looks. I better see you there."

"Yeah, yeah. You know I won't miss it." Pyo steps in the middle and looks at the nearest frames. He whistles. "These are all so good. So you've finally finished all the pieces?"

Mino scoffs. "I sure fucking did. I pulled an all-nighter with the last one."

He shakes his head. "I don't know where you get your drive, man."

"Don't rely on your drive, rely on your discipline." Mino wisely replies, laughing at Pyo's droll face. "You can make it. You still have two days to finish your required pieces, Just don't keep fucking off."

Pyo protests. "Hey, I don't fuck off that mu—"

Mino's ringing phone cuts off his friend's protests. He looks at the screen and sees KANG SEUNGYOON CALLING.

"What's up."

His voice is low, scratchy. Like he just rolled out of bed. "Where are you?"

"At school. Setting up the thesis exhibit."

Seungyoon pauses. "Ah, never mind. See you later then—"

"Hey, hey, hold on. What's up?"

"I have an emergency situation at home—"

Mino is already walking towards the exit, waving a hurried goodbye to a bewildered Pyo. "I'll be there. Give me five minutes."

  


**FRIDAY, 11:46 AM**

  


Mino is comfortable in life, but Seungyoon is filthy rich. His mother is a well-known, well-respected neurosurgeon. The kind that wins the Harper Avery--the first Korean female doctor to win the award, to be exact. Mino only knows about it because he immediately Googled what a Harper Avery award is after Seungyoon shared it to him in passing.

But you'd never know it with Seungyoon that he's rich. For one, he dresses too simply. He doesn't care whether it's a 1,000 USD shirt or a 10 USD bargain. His university car is a Ford Mustang GT, but he has no qualms with taking the night bus or walking. He loves an exquisite rhubarb compote from The Parkview in Shilla Hotel, but he equally craves for the artificially-flavored strawberry bingsu place across their Uni. It's a wonder that Seungyoon didn't grow up to be an insufferable prick, even with a busy single mom raising him. 

Mino is let in by the elderly housekeeper, passes by their well-manicured lawn, and through the severe glass and wood decor of the sprawling residence. 

He finds Seungyoon's formidable mother in the airy kitchen that holds equipment worthy of a five-star restaurant. Mino bets it's only the second or third time she's been in there this year.

Mino greets her. "It's good to see you out of hospital scrubs, imo-nim."

"Oh, this old thing?" She gestures to the frilly apron, a stark contrast to her smart emerald green sheath dress. Do rich people own no house clothes? Mino wonders. "I had an unexpected day off, so here I am, baking Seungyoon's favorite."

Mino comes closer to the gleaming countertop. Sure enough, there was a glob of what could be a batter of something. Whatever it is, it's smeared with a stiff-looking pink frosting. Wait, it might be a custard? Mino's about to compliment her on it, but Seungyoon's mom is just too excited.

"It's strawberry cake!" she exclaims, grabbing the pan and shoving it unceremoniously in the oven.

He nods as if he agrees. But of course, Mino doesn't have the heart to say it looks like his cat Johnny's vomit.

For Mino, who grew up with a mother who can make anything and everything from scratch, he wonders if it's why Seungyoon eats like a scavenger whenever he visits Mino's house?

As Mino struggles with what to say, Seungyoon's mom looks at him kindly. "What brings you here, young man?"

Mino blinks. "Well, Seungyoon said he has an emergency…"

"Huh." His mom glances at the direction of the wide staircase, confused. "Well, he hasn't come down yet, so I thought he was still asleep. That boy…" She sighs. "Can you tell him to go down for lunch? It's my rare day off, and I haven't seen his face at all today."

Mino belatedly realizes his mistake and cringes. It's not as if Seungyoon warned him, though. "Sure thing, imo-nim."

"You finished with your thesis? Seungyoon told me you're holding an exhibit. I'll make sure to drop by after my hospital shift."

"Yes, it's on Sunday. It's going along well." Mino replies, a bit flustered. "Just finished the last piece. Of course, you're very welcome to come."

She looks over at him with a proud sigh. "You're a very hardworking young man. If only my Seungyoon can learn more from you."

Mino disagrees immediately, compelled to defend his best friend. "He's very hardworking! He's graduating with honors, isn't he?"

Seungyoon's mom rolls her eyes. "Yes, but he'd always been a naturally bright kid. He doesn't really need to exert a lot of hard effort in studying." She takes off the equally frilly oven mittens from her delicate surgeon hands, the way one would remove surgical gloves. It amuses Mino. 

"Well, one good thing is that he's finally agreed to go and take the application test for medical school."

That catches Mino's attention "...Oh?"

"Yes, and put that Biology major into good use." She halts, measuring her words. "It's not that Seungyoon takes bad photographs. He has a knack for it. But he could always do that on the side, you know."

Mino nods, keeping his lips pressed. This is a surprise. Seungyoon has never mentioned this to him. 

Seungyoon's mom perches on a stool, surveying him with renewed interest. "How about you, Mino? What are your plans after graduation?"

Oh no, he's not about to share his future plans to a two-time Korean Tatler Woman of the Year awardee after letting him know that she doubts photography is a viable occupation. Because, what would Song Mino, a Fine Arts major, say to that? Seungyoon's mom is not unkind, but a few minutes of idle chit chat would not be enough to sway her over-practical mind.

Mino lightly shrugs, keeping it casual. "No definite plans yet, but I'm just glad to be graduating."

They continue to chat about random topics, mostly Seungyoon's mom regaling him with hospital gossip about high-profile medical cases. Mino humors her, seeing glimpses of Seungyoon's child-like smile on her face. 

As she disappears towards the pantry, Mino's phone lights up.

From Seungyoon: _Come on up._

Mino stares at his phone. So Seungyoon is awake after all. A couple more messages appear on his screen, sent in rapid succession.

Ping. _Whatever you do, don't eat the cake._

Just in time, Seungyoon's mom returns and peeks inside the oven. "Would you like to have a taste test?"

"Well, I--" Mino glances down at his phone. 

Another message pops up. _MINO. The cake is poisoned._

Mino's eyes widen. What the fuck was he supposed to do, refuse Seungyoon's mother? Sweat unexpectedly forms on his temples. 

"Oh." She frowns at the oven. An unexplainable odor wafts over to Mino's senses. "The cake isn't ready yet, how odd. Maybe later, then?"

Mino abruptly stands, like a pop-up doll. "No worries, imo-nim. I'll just go up and check on Seungyoon."

"Alright. Stay for lunch, okay?"

Mino sprints for the stairs.

  
  


**FRIDAY, 12:16 PM.**

  
  


"Please tell me you have food."

Mino offers a squashed protein bar from his bag to Seungyoon, still in dark blue pajamas, ruffled hair, and swollen face. He takes it happily, throwing his door wide.

He steps in his room, a large one-bedroom with dark hardwood floors, high ceilings, and an ensuite bath outfitted. The room decor is all terribly patrician, save for the sci-fi movie posters, and hundreds of film photos displayed on two walls. His darkroom was moved to the attic a couple of years ago to save him space. 

Mino plops down on the plush leather couch. "You mean you've been hiding here the entire morning?"

Seungyoon is already halfway through the protein bar. "I got a whiff of what Mom was baking, and I just couldn't go out of my room. My stomach is not ready."

"Don't be a brat. Your mom gets a rare day off, and you haven't even seen her." Mino admonishes.

He glares at him, chewing the remains of the bar. "You go and taste the--" he makes air quotation marks, "--’ _cake_ ' and tell me if you would set foot in this house ever again."

"You're so harsh on your mom." Mino shakes his head. "It can't be that bad."

"Song Mino. Look at me," Mino reluctantly does, and finds Seungyoon gravely staring at him. "Do you remember last year when I couldn't make it to Jiho's birthday?"

"Yeah, you said you had stomach poisoning. What about it?"

"She made kimchi stew."

"No."

"Yes." Seungyoon hisses, like Mino doesn't believe him.

"But, you had to stay overnight at the hospital for that!" He exclaims in horror.

Seungyoon pads over to his personal fridge to get a drink of water. "How do you think I got my second Leica? The good woman bribed me to keep it a secret, and I was too weak to say no."

Hah, perfect opening. "And what did your mom bribe you with to make you apply for medical school?"

Mino raises one eyebrow at him. Seungyoon blinks, clearly surprised. Carefully, he sets down his glass.

"She told you, huh," Seungyoon mutters. 

"Why is it a big secret?" Mino asks. "You? Keeping secrets from me?"

Seungyoon groans. "It's not a secret. It's just not a big... deal."

"You sure about that."

"I haven't thought about it much. I just want to enjoy these last few days, before everything changes."

"What needs to change?" Mino laughs. "What's up with you?"

Seungyoon sits down on his bed. "Just feeling a little sentimental, I guess. Thesis and graduation and all of that."

Mino closes his eyes. God give me patience. "You made me come all the way over here because you're feeling sentimental?" 

"No, don't be silly." Seungyoon gives him a dazzling smile, one that always works on strict mothers and surly teachers. "I need you to choose which sweater to wear with what for tonight."

"And why do you suddenly care about your outfit?"

"Humor me. It's my last gig as a free man—"

"—You mean, as a student—"

"And what were you doing anyway?" It's Seungyoon's turn to cross his arms. His fox-like eyes narrow at him. "Who were you with that's more important than me?"

Mino sighs. Seungyoon has never learned to share well. _Only-child syndrome_ , Mino and Jiho call it. "Don't be dramatic. I was just with Pyo."

Seungyoon sulks. "He's not coming with us tonight, right? Because I only got you and Jiho tickets."

He fights a grin. "No, he's not. Pyo's busy cramming for his exhibit."

Seungyoon continues to glare at him sullenly. Mino stands up with a huff, crosses the room and opens the huge teak closet. A waft of his scent assaults him. Woodsy, clean, and something else. He should be used to this by now. 

"Wear the red sweater." Bright colors always suit his paleness. Seungyoon jumps from the bed with glee, pique forgotten. 

Mino shakes his head at him. "You could be such a baby."

Seungyoon awards him with an unabashed grin. Mino doesn't forget how his dazzling smile works on him, too.

  


**FRIDAY, 7:01 PM.**

  


They drive to their favorite convenience store for their Friday night pre-game. Usually, the alcoholic selection in bars isn't to Seungyoon's taste (or sometimes, Mino just doesn't want to keep shelling for overpriced beer), so they end up drinking first at the parking lot. Mino spots his favorite tteokbokki seller and shares it with Seungyoon.

As always, they talk about their day inside Seungyoon's car. Mino is careful not to spill anything on the leather seats, not that Seungyoon gives a fuck. Sometimes, Mino rants to Seungyoon about inconsequential details that he wouldn't really think of sharing. Sometimes instead of putting it on his sketchbook, he'd just share it with Seungyoon. Mino gets the same comfort.

Sometimes, Seungyoon practices his setlist inside the car, while Mino quietly listens to his rich, rich voice. Tonight, the setlist is mostly love songs. One of Mino's secret habits is pretending that Seungyoon sings to him while they're are alone in the car.

If only.

  


**FRIDAY, 8:01 PM.**

  


"I'm dedicating my last song tonight to all of you who came out for my last gig as a student!"

The crowd cheers for Seungyoon. From where Mino stands, he silently congratulates himself for picking the red sweater. No one in this room can look away from Seungyoon, least of all Mino.

"And of course, to my best friend, Song Mino. Where are you? Mino?" Seungyoon scans the crowd and spots him. Mino raises his beer. "Ah, there he is. Mino! I love you!"

Mino nods and grins.

"Bro, I love you!"

His smile dims a little. 

He sighs, berating himself once again. 

Seungyoon adjusts the leather guitar strap and starts strumming. His last song is Bonnie Raitt's I Can't Make You Love Me. But like the unintentional emotional manipulator that he is, he sings the Bon Iver version.

Always a crowd favorite. A hush falls over the audience. Seungyoon's voice rings clear in the room.

  


_'Cause I can't make you love me if you don't_

_You can't make your heart feel something it won't_

  
  


"He's good." Mino glances to his side and finds a girl who has walked up to him, making conversation. She smiles invitingly. "Is Kang Seungyoon single?"

Before Mino can reply, a heavy arm drapes around his shoulders, and Woo Jiho leans towards the girl's face.

"Sorry, you're not his type", Jiho says gently. "Shoo."

The girl glares at Jiho and leaves them alone.

Mino narrows his eyes, "That was completely unnecessary."

Jiho clinks his beer to Mino's. "And you're welcome."

  


_Morning will come and I'll do what's right_

_Just give me till then to give up this fight_

_'Cause I can't make you love me, if you don't_

  
  


Mino feels Jiho's eyes hovering in his direction. He looks at Jiho, who's shaking his head in mock pity.

"You're a goddamn masochist, you know that, right?"

"Oh, fuck off."

Seungyoon finishes his set to thunderous applause and choruses of "More! More!". But he just waves and jumps off the stage, making his way to Mino and Jiho. Mino can feel all the appreciative eyes at Seungyoon, and how good it feels that Seungyoon's smile is for him.

Well, for him and Jiho.

"Good set!" Mino says.

Jiho agrees. "Yeah, man, you did an awesome job."

"I just saw you arrive." Seunyoon deadpans.

"Life of a future CEO, my man," Jiho admits, laughing. "I have a big project on Sunday, so I did overtime. But the important part is I made it!"

Seungyoon rolls his eyes, but Mino knows he's still pleased. He looks over at Mino. "You're sleeping over at Jiho's place tonight, right?"

Mino answers after taking a swig. "Yes, why?"

"Perfect." Seungyoon claps his hands together like everything is settled. "We're driving to Busan tonight."

They look at him, confused. Mino finds his voice first. "Huh. The fuck you're talking about? What's in Busan?"

Seungyoon clears his throat like he practiced the entire spiel pitch. "Busan Fringe Festival. It's only for three days. Sun. Beach. Beer. I'll give my Leica a spin," 

He looks at Mino, "You can sketch a bit while you're there," 

Then back at Jiho, "Hyung, you can.. do whatever it is you do. Then we drive back on Sunday."

Mino talks slowly like there is a part of the conversation that he missed. "I don't know if you're just really drunk right now, but you do remember that my exhibit opens on Sunday."

Seungyoon pouts. "Don't kill my vibe. We'll be back Saturday night! Plenty of time for your beauty sleep till Sunday." 

Mino works his jaw. No, Seungyoon's say-yes-to-me face will _NOT_ work this time.

Seungyoon bats his eyes shamelessly. "Please. Please. Please. Song Mino pleeeeeaase."

"No."

"Please."

"No."

"Please."

Mino puts some seriousness to his voice. "Kang Seungyoon, I said no. I have a thousand things still left to do tomorrow. I can't just drop everything and leave."

Seungyoon grabs his hands and grips them tightly, without releasing Mino from his earnest gaze. Mino feels Seungyoon's calluses rubbing on the back of his hands. _Fuck_.

"Please, Song Mino, please. For me?"

Mino takes away his hand, or else he'd be in trouble. He puts an arm around Jiho instead, finding the perfect scapegoat. "I'll go if you convince CEO Woo Jiho to go."

Seungyoon switches to Jiho without breaking stride. "Hyung. Please come with us to Busan."

Jiho shrugs. "Sure."

Mino's jaws drop.

" _YES,_ " Seungyoon yells in triumph. "I'll just need to say bye to someone, then let's go, okay?" He quickly walks away to talk to someone near the backstage.

Mino glares at Jiho in horror. Traitor. "What the fuck? I thought you had something for Sunday?"

He nods innocently. "I do. But I can have someone do it for me. CEO, remember."

" _HYUNG_."

Jiho raises his hands in defeat. "And besides, can you really say no when he does that cute face? I can't say it. I literally didn't have the heart to say no."

"He does that all the time to us! He knows what he's doing!"

"Yeah, but it never gets old." Jiho sighs fondly. "That cute pout, didn't you see?"

Mino grumbles. "You're so fucking whipped for Kang Seungyoon."

He scoffs. "If I'm so fucking whipped, what the hell should I call you, Song Mino?"

Stupid. Weak. Fool. Lots of things. But Mino wisely keeps his silence. Jiho doesn't even have to say touché.

"I want to see the beach. I'm due for a short break." Jiho replies earnestly. "As for you, do something about Seungyoon. Or do nothing. It's on you."

Mino takes a big breath. "Seungyoon told me he loves me. In front of this crowd. Just now."

Jiho raises an eyebrow.

"But Seungyoon just had to add it with 'bro.' Like, Bro, I love you." He groans, fighting the urge to throw tantrums on the floor. "I'm going insane. I don't want to be in a 5-hour drive with him, let alone a weekend out of town."

Jiho is clearly trying not to laugh at him. "Maybe it's exactly what you need. Big risks. Big rewards."

Looking back at this moment, Mino wonders what could have happened instead of having stood his ground and said No, I'm not coming to Busan.

"And Mino," Jiho's reply is annoyingly gentle. Even if Seungyoon said it without saying bro, you know how he meant it."

"I know."

"I'm just saying."

Mino presses his palm to his head. "This is a fucking big mistake, hyung."

Jiho pats his head, almost guilty but not quite. There's a brilliant gleam in his eye. "Then better make it now than waste another four years of not knowing, right?"

  
  


**FRIDAY, 8:55 PM**

  


After a hasty packing at Jiho's place (Seungyoon already has his overnight bag in his car, the sneaky bastard), they go to start their impromptu road trip on Seungyoon's car. Within ten minutes, Jiho immediately snores on the backseat.

Mino fiddles with Seungyoon's overly-complicated Spotify playlist. Where Mino's playlists are meticulously arranged by genre, composer, or year, Seungyoon's playlists are made with whatever mood he's feeling at that time.

Right now, he's looking at _I Don't Want To Study, But I Have to Pass This Exam or Else_.

Mino breaks the silence. "So why medical school?"

Seungyoon shrugs, his eyes carefully on the road. "It's as good a plan as any."

"But why didn't you tell me?" Mino asks. "I had no clue you were serious about pursuing it."

"It was just a way to get my mother off my back. You know how it is. And besides," His right hand reaches for the stick to change the gear. Seungyoon smiles mysteriously. "I don't tell you everything, Song Mino."

Mino laughs at this. "You don't? You sure?"

"Yep."

He thinks about all the things Seungyoon had shared with him that Mino wished he could forget. 

He mutters, "Could have fooled me."

Seungyoon changes the subject without warning, as they did whenever they're together. "Did we ever watch Arrival?"

"You mean the Amy Adams movie?" Mino thinks about this. "No, what we watched together was Interstellar, I think."

"Ah, right."

"But I heard it's a good movie. Is it on Netflix?"

"Yeah, I think you'll like it." Seungyoon pauses. "That movie fucked me up, man."

"Why?"

The car enters a dark tunnel; lights run past the car windows as they pass through, piercing the blackness. 

Seungyoon asks quietly, "If you could see your whole life laid out in front of you, would you change things?"

Mino follows him without missing a beat. "You mean if I knew beforehand that my decisions right now couldn't change the future?"

"Yes. If all of your decisions right now will lead to a predetermined, conclusive future." Seungyoon steals a glance at him, lightning quick. "What would you do?"

Mino considers this. "Then I'll find a way to live with my choices."

"Go on."

"I don't think to know the future means diminishing the meaning behind the choice you're making," Mino replies slowly. "In fact, I think that you know that every choice you make will actively shape what's to come, then it gives you a different sense of purpose. There's a power in that."

Seungyoon considers this. "That's a different way of looking at it," He says after a while. "I like it."

"What part bothered you?" Mino is curious.

"I'm disturbed by the fact that things already have a predetermined ending," Seungyoon admits. "What about free will and all that shit?"

Mino laughs. "You and your insane need to control everything."

He is incredulous, "Do you not feel the same way?"

"It's not just looking at the ending, man. It's not always about the end game." Mino explains earnestly, fired up now. They always end up this way when they talk about deep stuff about life that they don't really share with anyone else—even Jiho. 

"Your decisions that led to the ending—predetermined or not—are equally important. Don't get hung up on the ending. It's not the only important thing in the world." 

"So, if you knew how things were going to go…"

"I wouldn't change any decision." Mino firmly says. "I'll just focus on finding the purpose for it."

Seungyoon smiles to himself, the dimple in his chin showing even in the dim light of the tunnel.

"What?" Mino asks.

"You always make me see things differently. As expected of Song Mino." He grins, shifting the car into fifth gear as they roar out the tunnel and into the bright city lights. "Let's rewatch the movie together, okay?"

"Sure." Mino adjusts the car seatbelt to make himself more comfortable. Four hours and fifteen minutes to go. "Emerson did say it was about the destination, not the journey."

Seungyoon snorts. "Nerd."

"Hah. Coming from you, soon-to-be Doctor Kang?"

He rolls his eyes. "Mind the music, please."

  
**SATURDAY, 12:01 AM.**

  


Long drives always clear Seungyoon's mind. Whenever several big decisions loom over the horizon, the mechanical actions of handling the wheel, shifting the stick, pushing the pedal help him feel in control. That there's something that he can control.

He has always been accused as something of an escapist, but that's not exactly true. He likes to regroup when he gets overwhelmed and then return to fight again. He prefers to dig deep into himself and think about what he should do, from all angles. On a whim, he just decides to do it in Busan, away from all the noise of Seoul. 

Of course, it was decidedly out of the question to leave the city without bringing his two friends along with him. 

Selfish? Maybe.

The stoplight switches to red. Seungyoon tears his eyes from the road to glance at Mino's sleeping face.

**SATURDAY, 2:04 AM.**

Hound Hotel is a three-star establishment near the trendy Gwangbokro Culture and Fashion street because it's Seungyoon who had handled the booking. If he had left it to Mino or Jiho, they'd be slumming it in a cheap hostel. 

Upon their arrival at the check-in lobby, Seungyoon reaches out for his wallet to give his credit card to the sleepy receptionist. Mino and Jiho let him get the bill since it's his spur-of-the-moment idea anyway.

The room is decorated in tasteful shades of creams and grays. Two beds with a mountain of pillows look inviting against the floor-to-ceiling-video. The view must be spectacular in the morning.

Seungyoon collapses on the nearest double bed, day clothes, and all. Even before Mino can say anything, Jiho places his overnight bag on the second single bed. Mino shakes his head frantically. 

Jiho widens his eyes, a poor imitation of an innocent angel. "What? You know I kick a lot when I sleep. This is for your own good." He flashes him a smile.

Of course, it's not the first time that Mino and Seungyoon will share a bed. They've done it loads of time. It's just two nights, right? What can happen in between then?

Mino hates that his mind automatically begins to make all the justifications he would ever need.

Suddenly, he’s too antsy to even think of sleeping. He turns to Jiho.

"Let's check out the hotel bar?"

  


**SATURDAY, 2:29 AM.**

The hotel had a rooftop bar overlooking the bridge. Mino admits that the salty windy breeze and twinkling lights of Busan are already worth the drive—from a passenger's perspective.

When the staff serves them a bottle of tequila and a bucket of beer, Mino narrows his eyes at Jiho.

"I was thinking more of a nightcap, not an early trip to the grave."

"Relax. You're too high-strung." Jiho replies, waving his concerns away. "Let's play a game: I'll ask a question, and if I judge your answer acceptable, I'll drink. If it smells as bullshitty as this cheap tequila, you drink. Are you in?"

"What kind of a fucking drinking game is that?"

Jiho sighs tiredly. "Just humor your hyung, okay? It's been a rough couple of days for me."

Mino eyes Jiho's exhausted face. He works so hard to put up his own company after being a corporate slave for the past couple of years. No matter how they try to hang out frequently, there is still a divide between a working person and a Uni student. It's not exactly the same anymore.

"Fine." Mino concedes.

"I'll start." He pours tequila into a shot glass. "So, what's the stupidest thing you've done for Kang Seungyoon?"

"Fuck. Take your pick," Mino downs a gulp of the ice-cold beer before continuing. "Maybe the one where I had to ditch my sister's birthday dinner because Seungyoon was out drunk in a Gangnam bar. He just broke up with Kim Sejeong, and he wanted to drive. My taxi fare that night was like, my two weeks allowance."

"Fuuuuuuck, man. That's..." Jiho winces in sympathy. "Okay, I'll drink to that."

He downs the tequila shot. Mino refills the glass.

"Who among his relationships did you hate the most?" Jiho asks.

He has a ready answer. "The one who made him cry the most."

"Ah, yes. What's his name? The tall international student with the long face? Seungyoon was his guitarist for a time."

He remembers Seungyoon coming to Mino's house after dropping him off at the airport. They had mutually agreed to break up because the guy did not believe in a long-distance relationship. Seungyoon did not come out of his room for three days.

Mino won't forget his name. "Yu Tien." 

Jiho's face says fair enough and drinks the shot again.

Both of them fall silent. The wind picks up, making Mino shiver a bit, even as he feels the flush from the beer.

"Seungyoon doesn't know you draw him, right?" Jiho muses.

"Ah, he knows. He doesn't mind." Mino replies. "But Seungyoon hasn't seen any of the drawings in my sketchbook."

"Or else."

"Or else." Mino agrees. He'll know.

Seungyoon is aware, even flattered, that Mino uses him for reference. Vanity thy name is Kang Seungyoon. But Mino has never given Seungyoon a reason to peek in his sketch pad, as he has full access to his finished body of work anyway. Once or twice, Seungyoon has voiced that he's curious about Mino's sketches of him, but eventually, he has respected Mino's reticence. And besides, It's not like Mino barges in Seungyoon's darkroom any day he wants.

Mino sighs, eager to finish the drinking game. "What's the point of the game if you're the only one who gets drunk?"

"My, my, what an eager victim you make," Jiho grins. "Here's another: why haven't you done anything for four years? Why haven't you pursued Kang Seungyoon?"

He shrugs. This one's easy. "Whenever he's in a relationship, I'm single. When he's single, I'm dating. The timing never really comes together. And besides," Here comes the spiel: "Our friendship is too important to risk."

Jiho narrows his eyes. "Bullshit. Drink the shot."

"HEY."

"Your bond is incredibly special. Almost anyone can feel it."

Anyone except Seungyoon, Mino mentally corrects Jiho.

"And it's not only you who have done so much for him. Seungyoon has also done a lot of stupid things for you, you know."

"I beg to differ--"

"Two years ago. Remember when you were stranded in Daegu when you didn't catch the last train, and Seungyoonie came to pick you up? His mother almost alerted the Korean National Police when he suddenly went missing from their house."

Ah damn it, that's true. Seungyoon had made the three-hour drive in his brand-new car to fetch him in the train station. Worse, it was raining incredibly hard, almost zero visibility on the road. Mino had yelled himself hoarse in discouraging Seungyoon not to go after him in Daegu. But Seungyoon just calmly told Mino to stay put in the station and deftly cut off the call. 

In Mino's worry, he picked at an ugly fight with Seungyoon when he arrived at Daegu station. They ended up arguing half of the trip back home and did not speak to each other for a week.

In the end, Mino eventually caved first and brought Seungyoon homemade mocha cake baked by Mino's mom as a thank-you and apology. Seungyoon was already grinning by the time he finished three slices.

"It's not my fault he didn't alert his mom!" Mino protests hotly.

Jiho is unmoved. "Fucking drink that shot right now, Song Mino."

Mino grumbles, but he complies. Jiho continues his thoughts. "You and Seungyoon are two of the best guys I know. I'm serious, man. You two will be good for each other." He sighs dramatically, "If only one of you just pulls his head out of his ass."

Mino studies the shot glass, avoiding Jiho's eyes. "He doesn't feel the same way about me. Believe me, I'm firmly in a box labeled friends."

"You haven't even tried, man. Hasn't it occurred to you that maybe Seungyoon thinks you don't see him that way?" Jiho insists.

"Hyung, now _you_ drink that shot."

"I WILL NOT," Jiho thunders. He leans forward towards Mino, uncharacteristically serious. "Mino, listen to me. I don't believe in unlimited chances. The last chance to do something will happen sooner or later. And when that time comes, you better know what you're going to do with it."

Mino knows this, of course. He can't let them keep cruising like this forever. Sooner or later, Seungyoon will inevitably meet someone, or Mino will find a person enough to be an excuse. 

He knows this, but hearing Jiho say it out loud is jarring to his carefully-cultivated peace of mind. Maybe Mino should just down the entire bottle and forget about this whole conversation.

"Last question and this is for two shots," Jiho pushes the two shot glasses to him, with an I-dare-you look. "Are you in?"

"Bring it on."

"I've always been curious to know. How did you know that it was _different_ with Seungyoonie?"

Mino licks his lips and immediately schools his face to something neutral. He stalls Jiho. "Aside from the obvious, you mean?

"You and I, we've been friends before you met Seungyoon at Uni." Jiho shrugs as if this is all not a big deal, but Mino doesn't trust his guileless face. "Seungyoon has always openly dated both girls and guys. While you, my friend, have always stuck with the ladies."

Mino's hand grips the beer and takes a long sip.

Jiho cups his palm around his jaw, tilting his head curiously. "How did you know it was something more with him?"

Mino knows precisely the moment Jiho's curious about.

  
  


**FRIDAY, 9:32 PM. _ALMOST FOUR YEARS AGO._ **

  


One of the worst blizzards in the history of South Korea had hit Seoul.

Seungyoon hosted a house party for the freshmen. Mino was roped into coming because Jiho was curious about what Seungyoon's house looked like. But the bastard left after one hour in the party, arm in arm with a girl that Mino barely recognized.

Mino already had his bag with him as he prepared to leave the raucous party. Kang Seungyoon and his boyfriend, the usually shy and solemn Yu Tien, were fun hosts for the evening, but Mino barely knows anyone at the party, and it was getting late.

Usually, because Yu Tien the foreign-exchange student is shirtless and dancing in the middle of Kang Seungyoon's formal dining table, along with two other classmates. 

Science students are weird, Mino decides. He wonders what are chances of frostbite before he reaches the nearest train station.

"Going somewhere?"

He turned around to Kang Seungyoon's flushed face, his cheekbones tinged pink from the alcohol. Seungyoon held a half-finished beer bottle in his delicate fingertips. 

His eyes went from Mino's face to the floor-to-ceiling windows that offer no visibility from the snowfall. 

He put two-and-two together. Seungyoon's face transformed from languid to serious in two seconds. Mino was taken aback.

Song Mino and Kang Seungyoon had only been friends for three months. Back then, Mino found himself always amused by Seungyoon's antics—he's shameless, self-aware, and the opposite of snobbish. They had bonded quickly over photography, sci-fi films, and street food. Seungyoon is unfailingly smiley and sunshiney. Mino has never seen him in a bad mood.

But when all's said and done, Mino really hadn't known Seungyoon that long. 

"Song Mino, you are not thinking of leaving, are you."

Seungyoon was deadly serious.

Mino blinked, momentarily startled by his cold tone. He played it off by being sheepish in answering. "The snow wasn't this heavy a few minutes ago, I swear."

His laugh rang awkwardly through the foyer. 

"That's what I thought." Seungyoon leaned on the wall, face still stormy. "Because you're not stupid to leave my house to go through the worst blizzard in Seoul without telling me? Right?"

Mino swallows. "Right,"

They stared at each other in a weird standoff. Mino noticed that there was always something between them--akin to livewire. But Mino never dared examine it closely, unsure of what he'd find. He wanted Seungyoon as a friend. On that part, Mino was sure.

Seungyoon studied Mino's face intensely like he was looking for something. Mino had no idea what. And then he sighed. 

"I'm a poor host. You should have told me you're tired, man. I'll take you to the guest bedroom."

"To where?"

"Call your parents and tell them everyone's snowed in, and it's much safer to stay here and wait it out till morning," Seungyoon said. 

His guest bedroom was right beside where Yu Tien was staying. How did Mino know? He didn't at first. But his light sleep got disturbed by sounds. 

Several hours before dawn, he heard muffled laughter from the next room and recognized Seungyoon's low voice. The walls weren't soundproofed. Mino was about to reach for his headphones when he realized what was happening.

Seungyoon is having sex with a man in the other bedroom. 

Mino couldn't admit it that night, but in retrospect, he accepted: he was curious.

It was different to hear Seungyoon in this light, this side which was unknown to him.

Mino can hear the bed creak, the occasional soft male noise that makes his breath catch in his throat. 

Based on what he had heard so far, Seungyoon seems quite assertive in bed. To Mino's surprise.

And then... his curiosity and surprise slowly burned into something more treacherous. 

If it had been Jiho that he heard having sex, he would have rolled over and slept through it. Maybe ribbed him in the morning. Laughed about it. 

Seungyoon is a healthy male who can have sex with whomever he likes. Mino had always been supportive of his decisions and has kicked anyone's ass who had anything bad to say about it. 

But now--now, hearing the bed creak more vigorously in the room next to his and hearing someone let out a sudden audible oh, followed by a deep approving response from Seungyoon--yes, he's quite sure it was Seungyoon--Mino's mind is filled with images of what exactly Seungyoon was doing in there.

And Mino felt...

Mino felt like he wanted to be the one to make Seungyoon say _oh_. To make him respond like that. It should be him.

And there was the crucial difference.

Mino couldn't imagine joking about this with Seungyoon tomorrow morning. Not when Mino wants to barge in the room right this instant, yell at Seungyoon's boyfriend, and tell him to get his hands off his friend.

_Friend?_

_Who was he kidding?_

Mino laid on his bed, the dawning realization that was awash with both horror and fascination--he wanted to be in that man's place right then on Seungyoon's bed. 

That was when Mino knew, what he felt for Seungyoon was something else. 

  


**SATURDAY, 3:11 AM.**

  


Instead of answering the last question, Mino grabs the two shots and downs them in rapid succession, to Jiho's agape face. The alcohol burns a fiery line from his tongue down to his throat and settles bitterly in his insides.

Jiho leans back, folding his hands on his toned stomach. His laugh is loud, the noise ringing on to the Busan sea.

"I think you've been _very_ naughty, Song Mino," he declares.

  


**SATURDAY, 8:16 AM.**

  


Soft morning sunlight streams through the room. Mino opens his eyes in defeat, glaring at the uncurtained window. His throat is painfully parched. He really didn't need to finish that last bottle of beer. 

His glance moves from the offensive window and touches Seungyoon's face. Some time through the night, he had turned to face Mino's side. His cheek rests on his pink palm, mouth slightly ajar. It's during these times that Mino's hands crave to sketch him just like this. He really sleeps with abandon, not caring at all in the world. 

Seungyoon had kicked off the blankets, as he always does. The red sweater has ridden up his torso, exposing the lean lines of his stomach.

Mino allows himself one gossamer thought, _now there's a cure for my hangover_ , before gripping the edge of the blankets and gingerly throwing it over Seungyoon again.

Seungyoon's eyes flit open, startling Mino. They look at each other.

But Seungyoon's eyes are unseeing, unfocused. Mino softly laughs, waving his hand on his face. Seungyoon's hand reaches towards Mino's pillow, snuggles in, and closes his swollen eyes. 

Asleep again.

With a smile, Mino sighs and gets up to face the day.

  


**SATURDAY 9:50 AM.**

  


After a quick shower to set himself to rights, Mino goes down to the hotel cafe for the promised free breakfast. Jiho is nowhere to be found yet, but he spots Seungyoon in a corner table.

Mino goes to join him, but his stride falters slightly, as Seungyoon is not alone. An unfamiliar man sits with him, his arm resting at the back of Seungyoon's chair.

Alarms ring inside Mino's head.

Seungyoon grins brightly when he arrives at their table. "You look well-rested. Did you and Jiho really still drink right after we arrived?"

"Just a few shots," Mino replies distractedly. He extends his hand to Seungyoon's mystery companion. "Song Mino."

"Lim Jaebum." The guy greets back, grasping his hand firmly before letting go. He sports a serious-looking face, all sharp eyes, and an intimidating mouth. He wears his long-ish hair on a tight bun at the nape of his neck. A small piercing winks from his nose. But the smile he offers seems to be genuine. "You can call me Jhae."

Mino's brows furrowed. "Sorry. Did you say Jhae?"

He nods, "Yes, it's Jhae."

Mino pauses. Then gets it.

"Ahhh... with an h." He nods quickly. "Got it." 

Seungyoon's lips twitch like he's trying to fight a smile.

Mino takes a seat between them, his head suddenly pounding. It's far from a hangover. Seungyoon leans towards Mino and advises him to order his breakfast before the hotel's cutoff time.

Mino hails one of the hotel staff. "One American breakfast and—"He pauses as Seungyoon and Jhae laugh about something he didn't catch. "I'll have an extra-strong coffee, please." 

Not that he needed the extra anxiety on what's going to happen next.

  


**END OF PART ONE**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to [yoonyogurt](https://twitter.com/YoonYogurt?s=20) and [camseungyoon](https://twitter.com/camseungyoon?s=20) for beta-reading. 
> 
> The lyrics found at the start of Part One is titled, "More Than What We Are". It is the actual song used in the opening of the IDILY movie.
> 
> I adore Seungyoon’s friendship with Jaebum. Please remember this when I update the next parts. (Sorry, I couldn’t resist putting the extra “h” reference :))
> 
> I am working hard at updating the next parts (along with the Seungyoon x Sejeong fic, Poison and Wine). Please do leave a comment if you enjoyed it. Thank you so much! For the next chapter update, you can drop by on my Twitter (@ksystellar), or sometimes I post it on my AFF wall.


	3. Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the warm response to this story! And I apologize for taking a bit longer to update. I had known from the start that Part Two would be a beast to write. I kept going back and forth with this update for a week but figured ahh what the hell, let it rip
> 
> EDIT: Due to the initial reviews, I’ve updated the tags to reflect the story direction. Self-care comes first! I know it’s a rough update, but please hang on and TRUST ME <3
> 
> There are some flashbacks in this update. Please mind the date and time before each scene :)

**Part Two**

**Four years ago. Wednesday. 5:40 PM. Seoul.**

"Mom, I'm home."

The afternoon sunlight slants through the living room windows. Mino relocks the front door, and he slips off his shoes. His mom pokes her head from the kitchen.

"Oh, good, you're here. Seungyoon's in your room."

_He's early?_ Mino's supposed to take a shower first before heading off to Seungyoon's gig tonight. Whatever. With Seungyoon, he's going to get a free ride to the venue.

If he had his way, Mino would rather have a quiet night at home. Exams today had been draining as fuck. But as usual, he has never been good at saying no to Seungyoon. Maybe he could just sleep straight through the weekend.

He opens the door to his room and finds Seungyoon standing over his drafting table, holding his black sketchbook.

Mino freezes.

Seungyoon turns to him, grinning widely. " _FINALLY_ he arrives. What kept you?"

"Group meeting." He swallows, numbness rapidly climbing from his toes, up to his knees, making them tremble. Don't panic. "Why are you early?"

Seungyoon plays with the edges of Mino's sketchbook, idly flipping the pages as he answers. "The exam was easier than I thought. I over-prepared. That damn professor really scared the entire class about this particular test, and he..."

He continues to rant. Mino has already tuned him out, mentally calculating how fast he could snatch away his sketchbook without alarming Seungyoon. Why the hell didn't he put away his art stuff before he left for school? One day, that sketchbook will get him in trouble. He just knows it.

In the middle of his internal fretting, Mino doesn't realize right away that Seungyoon has already stopped talking and walks over to him. 

_"Relax_. I didn't open it." He hands Mino his sketchbook with a knowing smile. I was looking for your porn stash."

He grips his sketchbook until his fingertips hurt, a _whoosh_ of relief courses through him, not unlike pain. Valiantly, he tries to keep it out of his voice. "Fuck you, I don't have a porn stash."

"Right. Because it's all online now." Seungyoon walks over to Mino's bed and makes himself comfortable over his duvet. Unlike his room, Mino has no sitting area in his bedroom to receive guests. Not that it ever bothered Seungyoon—in fact, it seems like he prefers hanging out here more.

"What's in that anyway?" Seungyoon asks as he fluffs Mino's pillow. Satisfied, he settles his back on it and looks at him with his disarmingly sharp eyes. "Why don't you ever let anyone look at your sketchbook?"

_Because everything about what I feel for you is in there_ , Mino answers him in his head.

Instead, he shrugs nonchalantly. "I just don't like letting people see the first sketches of my work, that's all." Mino opens the drawer under his draft table and slides the sketchbook in. Safe again. 

"Anyway, the final work is out there in the world to see."

Seungyoon suddenly laughs at his answer, turning to his side to face him, his head propped up by his delicate hand that Mino has sketched a thousand times. 

"You're so _weird,_ Song Mino." But the look in his eyes is gentle. "You know that I don't mind looking at your mistakes."

Mino smiles back at him, "I know you don't."

Seungyoon soon moves on to other topics, eager to tell him about how his day went. Mino comments and reacts at appropriate times, but at the back of his mind, he wonders: Maybe he should just go for it. Let him look. Let him know. 

Maybe later, before he goes home. He'll let him know. 

  
  


**Four years later.**

**Present day. Saturday. 10:31 AM. Busan.**

  
  


The late morning sun bears down on Haeundae beach, the chilled pale ale sweats under Mino's tight grip. He warily watches Seungyoon and Jhae chat amiably from the bar where he sat, as the two walk together on the beach. Seungyoon is holding his film camera, taking photos of the blue horizon. Sometimes, he takes pictures of Jhae.

Beside him, Jiho leans back on his seat, his eyes never leaving the two as he recites the old classic song. " _Two old friends meet again. Wearing older faces. Talk about places they've been_."

Mino glares. "Thanks hyung, that's _very_ helpful."

Jiho raises his hands in surrender. The hotel beach bar is still devoid of people, those odd hours of the morning where partygoers are still dead to the world. Mino wonders if it's not too late to head back to the room and catch some sleep, if only to keep himself from holding vigil over the two's beach stroll.

"Who the fuck is the old friend anyway?" Jiho asks.

"Jhae." Mino replies. "Jhae with an 'h'. Apparently, he's one of the festival organizers."

Jiho scratches his chin thoughtfully. "With an 'h', huh."

Both of them scrutinize the two boys' interactions. Seungyoon says something that makes Jhae burst into laughter. 

Mino takes a deep swig of his beer and looks away.

"He looks cool, though. That dermal piercing under his eye..." Jiho whistles. "You just know he's the kind of person who doesn't give a fuck about what others think about him. Trust Seungyoon to always be surrounded by interesting people."

Mino scoffs, feeling petty because he knows what Jiho said was true. "I can't respect anyone who spells their name with an unnecessary H, though."

Jiho turns away from watching the two and snatches Mino's beer. He takes a sip and makes a face. 

"Ah, as expected."

"What?"

"Your beer is bitter as fuck. Maybe you need a change of drink." Jiho wags his eyebrows at him. Mino gets his beer back, annoyed.

"I AM NOT BITTER, HYUNG."

"I said, the beer was bitter, Mino." Jiho lazily smiles. "But if the shoe fits..."

Mino rolls his eyes but says nothing. Okay, he is kind of bitter. It doesn't help that Seungyoon's adoring eyes have been trained at Jhae this entire morning, even during the unexpected breakfast that Mino had to endure under duress.

"Anyway, you really don't know this Jhae guy?" Jiho asks. Mino shrugs. "How could that happen? Aren't you and Seungyoon some kind of two peas in a pod who won't just give in and fu—"

"Hey guys," Seungyoon's voice came from behind their backs. 

Jiho and Mino flinch, and they turn around slowly.

"Hey," Jhae comes up behind Seungyoon and waves at them. Mino and Jiho wave back a hello.

"Where'd you like to go for lunch?" Seungyoon asks, his face a bit pink from under the sun. 

Jiho's startled-looking face tells Mino that he hasn't fully recovered from thinking he'd been overheard, so it's up to Mino to save them. 

He puts on a cheery tone. "How about some tasty grilled pork barbecue? Since we're at the beach and all, this calls for—"

"Oh..." Jhae interjects mildly. "But do you guys mind if we eat somewhere else?"

Mino, Jiho, and Seungyoon look at him expectantly.

With a touch of apology, Jhae announces that--" I'm vegan."

Mino nods slowly. Of course he is.

  
  


**SATURDAY. 11:03 AM.**

After some walking around the hotel's block, the four of them end up settling in a bistro called Cosmic Pasture. If the decor was any indication of their food, then Mino certainly knows where this lunch is heading: kitschy, bland, and unsatisfying.

As they study the menus, an awkward silence hangs over their table. Mino decides to prove to Jiho that he's not bitter, and certainly, he's _not_ insecure. 

"So does being vegan help you maintain your physique?" Mino asks Jhae brightly, eyeing his biceps.

He answers with a self-conscious smile. "I haven't been vegan that long, to be honest. Just trying it out. So far, I'm holding up well. But if I'm presented with a full-on _samgyeopsal_ course, then there's no telling what I'd do."

_Then why do we need to suffer with you?_ Mino thinks, annoyed, but he notices Seungyoon looking at Jhae with a proud smile. 

Oh right, Mino takes a deep calming breath. He's putting up with Jhae because of his bastard best friend.

Jhae waves to another table outside, and stands up abruptly. "Ah, please excuse me for a moment. I need to say hi to someone."

He leaves the table, and the moment he steps outside, Jiho and Mino glare at Seungyoon.

Seungyoon presses his lips together. He knows he's in trouble.

"Hey Seungyoonie." Jiho leans forward, all-serious. "I didn't travel all the way to Busan to munch on green leaves like a goat."

"*Meeeeeeeeeeee.*" Mino supplies helpfully.

"No, no, no, you got it wrong." Jiho corrects him. "It's MeeeeeHHHH."

"Or was it MHeeeeeeeee.."

Seungyoon sighs. "Guys, come on. Be nice."

Mino looks at him innocently. "We _are_ nice. We put an extra h just for Jhae."

The corners of Seungyoon's mouth threatens to twitch with a grin, but Jhae returns abruptly, making the three of them shut up.

He sits down with an expectant smile. "Anything you want from the menu?"

Mino tilts his head in a subtle challenge. "We want grilled pork belly."

Jhae's face wilted a little, unsure how to reply.

Jiho slowly looks at Mino's uncharacteristically serious tone.

He glances at Seungyoon. His eyes are imploring: _Please, please be nice, Mino_.

Mino cracks into a wide grin, closing his menu. "I'm kidding, man. How about you order for us? Since none of us are vegans, you'd probably know best."

"Ah sure." Jhae agrees readily and flags for the restaurant staff.

Jiho leans forward, resting his chin on his hand. "Why not order something made with hearty vegetables? That's good for our _hearts,_ right?"

Jhae nods. "That's a great suggestion. They do have this dish right here..."

Mino kicks Jiho under the table.

  
  


**SATURDAY. 1:21 PM.**

After the predictably unsatisfying lunch, they agree to head back to the hotel to freshen up.

As soon as they step inside the refreshing coolness of the lobby, a buff, good-looking guy approaches Jhae. An event ID hangs around his neck, so he must be one of the event staff working with Jhae. He looks worried.

"Hey man, we have a situation."

"Jackson, what's up?"

He takes a deep, calming breath. Never a good sign, in Mino's opinion. "One of the artists backed out. We still have a blank wall that's supposed to have a mural on it."

"What?" Jhae groans. "Where the hell would we find a mural artist this late in the day?"

The guy named Jackson stutters to answer, but Seungyoon gestures a hand to Mino's direction. "I'm so glad you asked, as we have a super talented artist right here."

Mino protests, " _Hey_ , I don't think—"

Jhae and Jackson latch on to him like sticky gum to shoe. Jackson looks like he's ready to get on his knees and beg. "Are you an artist? You could do the mural?"

"Well..." Mino rubs the back of his neck, uncomfortable with the sudden development. "Well, it depends on what kind of art you're looking for. My style might not be—"

Jhae shakes his head. "Don't worry about that. Fringe festival welcomes all kinds of music and art style. We're going to pay your standard rate, of course. Do you want to look at the space?"

He swiftly puts an arm around Mino to herds him to where the event was being held by the beach. As they walk, Mino swings his head to look back at Seungyoon accusingly.

Seungyoon widens his eyes innocently as if to say, _What_?

However, when Mino sees the massive wall he'd be working on, his fingers begin to itch. Mino's mind already starts to form all kinds of possibilities against the backdrop of Haeundae beach.

_Damn Jhae and Seungyoon._

Jhae prods him. "Well, what do you think?"

Seungyoon smiles knowingly. "He'll do it."

Mino glares at him, but Jhae jumps on him for confirmation. "Are you really?"

"Sure." Mino shrugs. "I can use it for my portfolio anyway."

"You've literally saved all of our asses." Jhae closes his eyes in palpable relief. "I'm so, so glad that you're all here."

He warmly smiles at him, which Mino returns it weakly. He does seem like to be an awesomely nice guy, but—

—as Jhae ruffles Seungyoon's hair to thank him next—

—Mino can't bring himself to say the same.

  
  


**SATURDAY. 4:04 PM.**

As expected, the festival committee enthusiastically approves Mino's preliminary sketch of what he plans to do with the wall. Mino laments the lack of time because he could certainly do something more elaborate, but he figures he doesn't want to overpromise and do a lousy job. 

The three of them trudge back to their hotel room because everyone wants a shower. 

As Jiho and Mino lounge on the beds to wait for their turn in the bathroom, Mino's phone buzzes with a call. 

Mino looks at the caller ID and swallows. He taps to answer.

"Where the hell are you?" His mom all but snarls on the phone.

Mino briefly considers lying for three seconds but decides it's not worth the aftermath. "Um, Busan."

"BUSAN?" She shrieks. "What are you doing there?"

Fortunately, Mino already knows the magical combination of words to calm his irate mother. 

"Seungyoon wanted to check out a festival here with Jiho-hyung and me, but it's just for the weekend."

His mom pauses. Mino mentally counts _3... 2... 1._

"Ahh, you're with Seungyoon." Her voice tones down considerably. "He knows you're opening your thesis exhibit on Sunday, right? You'll be home before then?"

Mino stifles a laugh. Never fails. "Of course he knows. Don't worry."

"Well then. Say hi to Seungyoon for me."

Mino rolls his eyes at her blatant favoritism. "Okay. Bye, Mom."

He puts down the phone, just in time for Seungyoon to come out of the bathroom, a white towel wrapped around his narrow hips. His hair is plastered to his neck, water droplets running from his shoulders, and down to his stomach's planes. 

Mino turns his head to the side, forcing himself to look at his phone again. 

Seungyoon reaches for another towel to rub it to his hair. "Who called?"

He hadn't realized his voice carried inside the bathroom. "My mom. She said to tell you hi."

Jiho interjects, wounded. "And none for me?"

"You know how my mom had always plotted how to legally change Seungyoon's family name to Song." Mino replies.

Seungyoon looks at Jiho smugly. "Don't take it personally, hyung."

Jiho narrows his eyes at him. "I don't understand why older people can't resist you. Even my own mom's like: 'How's Seungyoon doing these days? Why doesn't he ever come around the house anymore—"

Seungyoon nods knowingly. "It's because I am pure of heart and innocence. "

"—your innocence is as big as your ass, so that is to say, nonexistent—"

"HEY."

"DINNER," Mino cuts in before all this talk about ass gets out of hand. "Where are we going for dinner?"

Seungyoon shoots Jiho another glare before answering. "Since you were all craving for grilled pork earlier, why don't we do that? My treat."

Jiho cheers, and Mino nods. "Sure." As long as Jhae doesn't show up again, the evening is saved.

Seungyoon turns his back to them as he rummages in the closet for a shirt. Mino decides that he can safely take a peek for objective judgment. 

Conclusion: one can clearly see that Seungyoon has an ass. Sure it's on the smaller side, but it's pert and the shape clearly outlined by the damp white towel.

But Mino couldn't very well defend Seungyoon's ass to Jiho, right?

Seungyoon turns back around, holding two sets of boxer briefs. "Which?" he asks like it's no big deal.

Mino returns to fiddling with his phone. "I'm not choosing your underwear for you, Seungyoon."

Also his mind: _Black_.

Jiho lazily supplies the answer for him. "Pick the black one. The cut makes your ass look bigger."

"You're fucking paying for your dinner, hyung."

"Seungyoonie, I'm KIDDING."

**SATURDAY. 6:01 PM.**

True to form, Seungyoon brings them to a premium barbecue place with expensive-looking side dishes. It's the kind that Mino and Jiho would never pick casually on a spontaneous out-of-town weekend trip, but armed with Seungyoon's AMEX, they feel invincible.

Jiho and Mino take turns in flipping the meat because Seungyoon is particularly bad at it. As the only son, Seungyoon isn't used to acting as the youngest—unless he is looking to use it to his advantage. 

In the middle of their loud conversation (in which Jiho staunchly defends the name of his new business), Seungyoon's phone chimes.

Mino notices Seungyoon's frown immediately. "What's wrong?"

Seungyoon puts the phone down. "It's Jhae. His friend bailed on him, and now he's alone at that vegan place earlier."

Jiho's eyes widen innocently. "Gee, I wonder why."

Seungyoon gives him a withering look. 

"Do you want to go?" Mino asks.

Seungyoon hesitates. "Well... not particularly. But he hates eating alone."

Mino's mind whispers: _So how exactly well do they know each other?_

"Then you should go," Mino said instead.

He could feel Jiho's eyes on him, wondering what he's playing at.

Even Seungyoon looks at him dubiously, so Mino reassures him. "We'd just order something to-go for you. Because knowing you, you'd be hungry after eating only greens."

"Are you sure?" Seungyoon asks again.

Mino nods vigorously. "Of course. What are friends for?"

"You're the best, Song Mino." Seungyoon smiles and stands up, squeezing his shoulder on his way out. "Let's meet up for drinks after, okay?"

Mino smiles back. "Go. Jhae's waiting."

Jiho and Mino watch him talk to the cashier, probably to pay for their meal. He leaves hurriedly without looking back. Mino sighs, the expensive food looks less delectable compared to five minutes ago.

"Mino."

He looks up to see Jiho shaking his head at him. 

"What?"

Jiho opens a bottle of beer for him. He smiles like he doesn't know what to do with him.

"You're really a good kid, you know that?"

  
  


**SATURDAY. 7:34 PM.**

  
  


In his mind, he already had a name for the mural piece: Black Waves. 

It's not a particularly structured painting, nor had he desired to perfect the lines. Instead, he relies on the feel of it. Deep blues, black whorls, white waves. It's chaotic at first glance, but the strokes gave it volition.

Mino could sense Seungyoon nearby, taking photos of his art in its various stages.

From the beginning, Seungyoon had been Mino's number one supporter when it came to his art. When he had doubts, Seungyoon would be the one to encourage him to say yes to a project or say yes to an idea no matter how crazy it seems to others, say yes when he would have faltered.

In a way, Seungyoon's belief in his talent is _essential_ to how far he has pushed himself to grow. Yes, whatever happens with them, Mino will never forget that part.

When Mino finishes, sweat dots his forehead, and a sore neck already looms. A small crowd behind him murmurs their appreciation for the finished mural. Jackson comes over and compliments him effusively, and a few people already want to take their photo with the mural and the artist. 

He obliges the crowd for a bit before rejoining Seungyoon, who watches him from afar. Fierce pride shines in Seungyoon's eyes.

And at that moment, damn if Mino doesn't fall in love with Seungyoon a little more.

  
  


**SATURDAY. 9:17 PM.**

The hotel's rooftop bar teems with guests under the bright full moon, but the crowd remains thankfully chill.

Jiho waits for the bartender to give him his beer, and slides a look to the girl three seats away.

So far, they've been eye-fucking each other during the entire night since she'd arrived and situated herself to sit on the bar alone. Jiho mentally calculates who'd be the first to break down, but at the sight of her doe eyes, combined with her soft smirk had him standing up to approach her. He's not a sore loser.

Mystery girl clinks her whiskey glass to his beer bottle. "I thought you'd never stand up."

Jiho hands over his phone, and she inputs her number. The combination of her guileless face and confident demeanor is intriguing. "Until when are you staying here?"

She gives a beatific smile, in complete contradiction to her next words. "Long enough to satisfy our curiosity about each other, I suppose."

"Fair enough," Jiho glances at her name, inputted in his phone's contact list. "... Jieun."

"See you then." She hops off the barstool and walks away. Jiho sighs, _what a woman_.

On the other side of the rooftop bar, Jiho's eyes land on his friends' table. He waits a bit, observes the scene.

Mino's face is soft under the hanging yellow lights as he laughs about something with Seungyoon, who gestures wildly with his hands. Both are probably on their third beer now.

Earlier, Jiho did tell Mino to come into terms with what he's been feeling for Seungyoon, but that was before this Jhae person came into the picture.

What is he going to do with this situation?

Between the two of them, Seungyoon has been more complicated, a little bit harder to figure out. Even after years of knowing Seungyoon, Jiho sometimes wonders, does he, really? Beneath his polite demeanor and impeccable manners, there's a core in him that he doesn't let a lot of people see. 

Mino had always been the more transparent one, the kind that says what he means, and means what he says. And even better, he stands by it, unapologetic about the way he looks at things. He had always known what and who he wanted, and he had no qualms doing whatever it takes to get it: his art, goals, and even the people in his life.

But for some strange reason, Seungyoon had never figured out Mino's real feelings, blatant as it is to Jiho.

Sometimes, Jiho feels that only Mino and Seungyoon know their real selves.

What a pair they will make if only both of them realize it in time.

Jiho's thoughts are derailed by Jhae's arrival at their table. Both men greet him with a smile, but gone is the carefree look on Mino's face. His posture is visibly stiffer and guarded. 

Jiho sighs. Someone's heart would be cut and dried before the weekend is done, but he isn't sure who will be served on a platter.

He saunters back to the table, saying a quick hi to Jhae. He'd chosen to sit beside Mino, so Jiho sits with Seungyoon.

He pops open a beer bottle. "So what's the topic?"

Mino's eyes widen at Jiho, a bid for _help_. "This one—"gesturing to Seungyoon, "—is asking me what my dreams are after graduation."

Oh no. If Jiho and Mino don't stop this trajectory, they'd be dealing with an emo Seungyoon in minutes.

"Why is the topic so serious?" Jiho laments. "Seriously, I can't wait for you all to graduate because this level of sentimentality is frankly ridicu—"

Seungyoon stops him. "It's because we're talking about our friends who got featured in Melon zine recently."

"Ah," 

Melon zine is this super popular blog that features up and coming artists and personalities from different walks of life. It's not as mainstream as, say, Hypebeast, but Jiho sees their articles routinely being shared by the "cool" people in his SNS feeds. 

"And what about it?"

Seungyoon continues, "The thing is, they say if you're not featured in Melon zine, you're not making enough waves in whatever industry you're in."

Mino scoffs. "They? Who's they? The gatekeeping, editorial team who probably only feature their circle of friends up to second-degree of consanguinity and affinity?"

Jhae chuckles. "You're probably right."

Jiho agrees. "And I bet there are tons of bright young things that aren't featured in Melon zine. Just because something is popular, it doesn't mean it's any good."

"But the validation would be nice?" Seungyoon insists. "I don't know. It's nice to have this one measuring stick whether you're doing well or not."

Jiho doesn't agree. "Aside from yourself, the only measuring stick you should bother with is right here. We'll tell you if you're doing well or not."

"And you're doing well. Seungyoon." Mino looks at Seungyoon a tad seriously. " _STOP WORRYING_."

Seungyoon smirks at him, wanting to be cute. "But I do it so well like I excel in so many things."

Jiho shakes his head at defeat. "He isn't happy when he's not chasing something."

"And besides, I heard Melon zine is rigged." Mino shares.

Seungyoon perks up, interested. "Oh? What do you mean, rigged?"

Mino shrugs. "Rigged, meaning if you're not within their " _network_ ", then you won't get featured. If you want your work there, you gotta cough up."

Jhae is uncharacteristically quiet, and in a bid to draw him in the conversation, Jiho prods him to join. "Maybe Jhae knows some dirt that we don't."

He laughs aloud, the tips of his ears a bit red. "Actually, I've already been featured in Melon zine."

That shuts the three of them up.

Jiho has never realized that the ocean's waves can be heard from here—what with the excruciating silence on this table that no one seems to want to break. 

He reaches out his beer to clink his to Jhae, and offers his sincere congratulations. "That's awesome, man."

Mentally, Jiho thinks, what the hell would these two do without him?

"Thanks," Jhae says modestly. "It was just a small feature. They did this bit about the trend about body modification, so they got interested in my work."

Mino makes a face, "Man, you should have said something the moment I said that bit about them gatekeeping and shit."

Jhae grins. "It's alright. I did know one of the editors. And if you ask me, there are many more reputable piercers they could have featured." He shrugs. "But I guess they didn't have the right 'vibe' they wanted for Melon zine."

"Don't put yourself down, Jhae." Seungyoon says sharply. "You're brilliant at what you do. We're just fucking around."

Jhae holds his gaze softly, "Thanks, Seungyoonie."

Oh boy. Jiho covertly looks at Mino and sees his jaw grinding.

He could only think of one thing to salvage this situation. 

"SHOTS?" 

Everyone grudgingly complies. Mino downs his with a straight, fluid motion, never a good sign. He wants to get hammered tonight. Jiho switches the topic to a safer one. 

He turns to Seungyoon. "So, tell us more about medical school."

"What?" 

"I know you took a Science major to appease your mother, but I really thought you'd go full-time with photography." He isn't just asking him as a way to distract. Jiho really had been curious about this part. "I didn't know you had dreams of following your mother's footsteps."

Seungyoon pours himself another shot. "It's not like she forced me to enter medical school. It was my decision." 

Mino asks, "Why?"

"I've done what I wanted for four years. She never complained, never said anything. I thought it was time to have some resemblance of direction in my life." 

Mino frowns. "It's not like you're some wayward, irresponsible, good-for-nothing brat."

Seungyoon barks a laugh. "Eh, not on my good days. Another shot?"

Jiho takes his with minimal complaint. 

Seungyoon soon excuses himself to go to the bathroom, leaving Jhae with them. Interesting. He's yet to figure out if this will be an improvement to the situation... or an accelerator to the next stage of disaster.

Why? Because Mino now turns to Jhae for his version of small talk, AKA getting to know the competition.

"So, Melon zine." Mino pours Jhae another shot. "Sounds interesting. How did you get the feature?"

"I suppose they figured that the youth-who-dropped-out-and-learned-piercing-from-all-over-the-world angle was interesting enough to write. Though it was just really my backpacking around Europe, and I happen to hang out with people really good at piercing."

"Hey, I'm really sorry about my comments earlier." Jiho knows Mino is sincere in his apology. "I didn't mean to offend."

Jhae waves it away. "No need for that. I perfectly know what you mean. I just said yes to the feature because the added exposure to future clients would help pay the bills."

"You must be good. if Seungyoon says so." Jiho offers.

"I don't even know why he said that so strongly," Jhae complains, a bit flushed. "It's not as if he has agreed to let me do any piercing for him."

Jiho grins. Knowing Seungyoon, fat chance of that happening. "So that's cool. You traveled around?"

He nods. "For a while, yes. I was gone for a bit. I've only been back in Korea early this year."

Interesting. Jhae continues. "But how did you and Seungyoon meet? You've known each other long?"

Jhae answers slowly, "You can say that." 

He hesitates. 

Even Mino looks up from the shot glass he'd been playing with. 

"We were together four years ago. But I wasn't in a good place at that time. So we broke up."

Oh.

Oh.

_Oh shit._

Jiho schools his face to the best neutral _is-that-so_ expression he could muster, and hope to God that Jhae doesn't look to his right.

Because Mino's expression—he looks like a bomb had detonated on his face. And maybe this unexpected information had been.

Jiho rapidly calculates how to manage the situation. 

_Ah, fuck._ Seungyoon and Jhae are exes. 

_Damn you Seungyoon, you should have told us right from the beginning._ "I see." Jiho manages. "So... You guys planned to meet here?"

Jhae shakes his head, "Ah, no. It was a shock to see him here. I didn't reach out when I arrived in Korea. I didn't think he'd be—"He swallows hard. "We ended things on a bad note. But he seems to have forgiven me. And he's matured a bit too. That's why I've been hoping that..."

Mino speaks up for the first time, his voice remarkably normal, curious. "Hoping what?"

Jhae doesn't look at him. "That Seungyoon and I can still fix this. Fix us."

Mino nods as if he understands. "Ah."

Jiho wants to bang his head on the table. Fuck.

"That's..." Mino seems like he's lost for words, but he raises his shot glass instead. "Let's take a shot to that."

The things he does for his friends. 

Jiho pulls his weight in manning the conversation with Jhae after Mino decides to mentally checkout. It could be construed as Mino being drunk, but Jiho knows better. 

He _wishes_ Mino was drunk. If only to forget what Jhae had just shared.

The thing is, Jiho doesn't detect one bit of malicious intent from Jhae. He isn't manipulating or gauging Mino's reaction when he had shared it. 

Like Seungyoon, Jhae's also entirely oblivious to Mino's feelings for his best friend.

After a long while, Seungyoon comes back. The line was long, he complains. 

It turns out that Jhae is only waiting for Seungyoon to come back and excuses himself to talk to one of the festival staff for tomorrow's event. He murmurs an apology and leaves the three of them again.

Seungyoon looks between Jiho and Mino. "What were you guys talking about?"

He asks both of them, but his eyes only rest on Mino's quiet face.

Jiho pipes up an answer. "Just Jhae's travels. It's all so... fascinating."

"Oh?" Seungyoon pops a beer open and reaches out to clink his bottle to Mino's.

Mino's eyes lift to meet his. "Nothing important."

He smiles like he didn't just hear straight from Seungyoon's ex that he's after for a reconciliation. 

Jiho resists the urge to put his hands to his face. Tonight will be a fucking disaster.

**SATURDAY. 12:01 AM.**

For Mino, the most enticing perk about being drunk is that everything is muted, numbed down to a manageable state.

There's always certain invincibility found at the bottom of a beer bottle. Mino is not too proud to use it when sorely needed.

Tomorrow (or—he checks his watch—today), he'd deal with this like a man.

But right now, at this very moment: let's pretend Song Mino is the standard drunken idiot on a beach.

Let's pretend that Song Mino didn't just hear Seungyoon is here with his ex, who wants him back.

Sure. He'll be fine. How can he not be? He's blissfully drunk.

He taps Jiho's shoulder and gestures to a pretty girl sitting by the beach bar. Her body is angled to their direction and had been sending covert glances their way.

"Hyung." Mino slurs. "That cute girl over there. I think she's checking me out."

Jiho laughs. "Don't be ridiculous, she's looking at me."

"I'm totally her type." Mino insists.

"Oi." Jiho moves Mino's beer bottle away. "You should cut yourself off. You're too wasted."

Mino rolls his eyes. "Am not."

Seungyoon, who's busy tapping away on his phone, looks at them with a cursory glance. "What are we talking about?"

Mino leans toward him. "Seungyoon, look at that girl by the bar. She's totally checking me out. right?"

"Don't waste your time," Jiho advises. "It's me she's interested in."

Seungyoon cranes his neck around to look. "I dunno, hyung. It does seem like she's into Mino."

Jiho cocks an eyebrow, "Wanna bet?"

He nods at the girl. To Mino and Seungyoon's astonishment, the girl nods back, a small but definitely flirty smile playing on her lips. With that, Jiho stands up and leaves some bills on the table.

"Well kids, it's been fun hanging out with you, but the adult needs to have his fun now."

Seungyoon waves him away. "Then shoo."

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Mino wisely advises, the past consequences of Jiho's exploits suddenly rolling in his brain like movie credits.

Jiho laughs abruptly and ruffles Mino's hair. "You stole my line, kid."

They watch him approach the girl, and they leave together. A light breeze sweeps over the rooftop bar, bringing a sudden chill to Mino's arms despite the alcohol.

He looks around. The bar already had the unmistakable energy of dwindling down for closure.

Suddenly, Mino is intensely aware that they're alone for the first time since they arrived here.

Yes, Mino is exhausted, but he's not ready to go back and face the facts.

Seungyoon gazes at the dark horizon, where the view of the beach would be in the morning. 

"I want to sober up a bit." He glances back to Mino with a smile. "Let's walk?"

  
  


**One year ago. Friday. 12:21 AM.**

The leaves' shadows form a pattern over Seungyoon's closed eyes. His school bag is a lumpy but adequate pillow for his head as he lays on the tickly grass. Beside him is his trusty film camera. He thinks he got a few good shots today.

He opens one eye, the sunlight blinding him for a moment. He raises his hand above his face, the light filtered in between his fingers. Summer has well and truly arrived.

He sighs. School will start soon, and so will senior year. The last three years were a bit of a child's play; he had picked his general courses based on how convenient it was to his schedule. An endless rotation of hanging out, taking photos, singing a gig when he chooses, going home, sleeping, repeat. He knows this kind of life will not last forever. 

His mom had tactfully left the medical school application on his desk for his perusal. All things considered, his formidable mother had been lax with him, but all parents had non-negotiables for their children.

Things are bound to change very, very soon. 

He drops his hand and glances at Mino, who had his sketchbook out, quietly sketching away. He looks at Seungyoon and seems startled--he thought Seungyoon had been asleep.

"Are you sketching me?" he asks.

Mino shrugs, returning his attention to his super-secret sketchbook. "Maybe."

It's not the first time he'd caught him--and not the first time he had wondered how he looked in his drawings. Mino had already explained he uses Seungyoon as a reference for poses, so maybe he doesn't even include his features, the pompous brat.

Still, he is curious. "You're not drawing me with horns, are you?"

"No."

Seungyoon shoots him a wary look but returns to his languid pose. Ah well, whatever helps Mino.

He closes his eyes. "Good."

"Just a tail."

  
  


**Present Day. SATURDAY. 12:05 AM. Busan.**

Walking along Haeundae beach is unexpectedly lovely at night. The sand feels nice between Mino's toes as he chooses to walk barefoot (Seungyoon declines politely and keeps his slippers on). In the distance, towering skyscrapers light up the horizon, the Gwangan bridge aglow with a thousand lights. It brings a novel sensation of walking between two different worlds. 

Ah fuck, maybe he really is too drunk.

It's not the first time they've wandered together aimlessly—whereas Jiho prefers a set itinerary, Mino and Seungyoon have no problem exploring with a loose idea of where they want to end up. 

In between moments where Seungyoon would stop and take photos, and Mino brings up a quick sketch, there is always endless talking. It's one of the greatest assets of their friendship: they can talk about anything. 

"Where's Jhae?" Mino begins to ask.

Seungyoon shrugs. "What do you plan to do after graduation? Specifically."

Something is genuinely weighing heavy in Seungyoon's mind for him to keep bringing this up. Instead of deflecting or asking what's wrong, Mino decides to cooperate and see where this conversation would lead. The thing with Seungyoon is sometimes you have to be creative in drawing out what he really wants to say.

Mino purses his lips. "Hmm, let's see. I want to put up my own cafe."

"Oh?" Seungyoon nods, smiling. "What kind? Fuck the third-wave--you'd probably start a fourth-wave kind of coffee shop."

He laughs. "Not really. Just a cafe where I can hang up my art, and I can sell it to whomever I please. Somewhere relaxing. Definitely nothing pretentious or snooty."

"Very chill."

"For like, five seconds." Mino grins. "I'd call it Osechill."

Seungyoon nods in approval, grinning with him. "What else?" 

Mino continues, excited to share it now that it's out in the open. He's really talking about it with Seungyoon. "Mom's going to be my co-investor. She'd already scouted some possible spots in Gwangalli. And she's excited about selling her homemade baked goodies. She's been working on the menu nonstop."

"Your mom is an amazing baker." Seungyoon exclaims. "Everything will be sold out in _seconds_."

Mino laughs. Truthfully, he expected her to shut him down and insist that he take on a corporate job, but all he received was unwavering support from his family. Even his Dad is sold on the idea.

"What about your exhibits?" Seungyoon asks. "Your art?"

"I can do both." Mino insists. "I'll make it work. Cafe business with art on the side. It'd be practical, but you know, not entirely giving up on my art."

"It sounds like a solid plan, Mino." Seungyoon affirms. He sounds sincerely happy, yet something gnaws at Mino's instinct. He is about to bring it up when Seungyoon finally speaks again.

"I feel like I'll be left behind."

Mino frowns. "What the hell are you talking about?"

He stops walking and turns to pick up a wayward shell. Examines it like he isn't particularly invested in what he's sharing. "I feel like everyone has chosen or is doing what they want to do already. And I haven't decided on anything. I'm just here, neither moving forward nor backward."

Mino shakes his head. Where is this melancholy coming from? It's so unlike him. "Seungyoon. Not everyone is doing that well, despite what everyone is sharing online."

"I know." 

Mino tries again. "Even if you've become a doctor, it doesn't mean you can't take photos anymore. Or you can't sing or make music. It doesn't have to always be one or the other."

"Maybe. But it just seems like..."

"Like?"

"... the last four years had been wasted. I didn't do well enough, didn't push hard enough. I could have done more. Instead, I just let life pass me by."

"That's not true, Seungyoon."

"Of course you'd say that."

"Of course, I'd say that because I know you, and it's not true."

Seungyoon sighs and walks faster. "You don't get it."

" _Hey_." Mino stops walking and turns to face Seungyoon. "Me? Not get you? Are you fucking kidding me?"

Seungyoon seems to shake off his stupor with the sight of an indignant Mino.

"Med school. Jhae." He ticks them off one by one. "You know what, maybe I don't get you because you've been keeping a lot from me."

Seungyoon puts an arm around him and prods them to continue walking. "Sorry, I didn't mean it that way."

The warmth of Seungyoon's body shouldn't be enough to ward off the cold wind, but strangely it is. Mino feels bold enough to continue his honest thoughts. The one that had been plaguing him since this morning.

"You didn't even tell me that Jhae's your ex. I would have been friendlier to him, you know." Mino chides him. Seungyoon laughs in defeat. "No more secrets, okay? Not cool."

"Alright."

"So..." Mino asks with a calm that he does not feel. "What's the deal with him?"

"Not much."

Does Mino really want to push? He could just leave it like this and move on to the next random topic. 

Does he want to hear it? 

He doesn't want to, but he has to.

"C'mon, lay it on me."

There was a small pause. Mino is ready for a deflection, but to this complete surprise, Seungyoon starts talking.

"Four years ago Jhae and I had an intense thing, the kind that I thought would last, at least... more than three months. We'd parted ways, and I'd convinced myself that I'd never see him again. 

And then yesterday we saw each other for the first time in four years.

We haven't really talked about anything _\--it-_ -yet it's just…"

Seungyoon stops walking and faces Mino, the conflict plain in his face. It hurts Mino to see him this way, maybe even more than the ache that has broken through the effects of the alcohol.

"It's just _hard_. The history. It's hard to run away from history. Hard to say no to someone you really thought you loved."

Mino agrees in his head. _Tell me about it._

"I want to say no, I thought I had already moved on, but..." Seungyoon trails off. 

"But?" 

Go on. Say it.

"Maybe it's because it happened a long time ago." Seungyoon sighs. "But this morning it' s— _bam_. I see him again, and it's like, all I remember was how good it was." 

"Like seeing a supercut."

Seungyoon looks at him. "What do you mean?"

Mino replies. "It's the supercut of your relationship. The highlight reel. Since you're not angry anymore, all the good parts are now playing in your head."

"Like a highlight reel," Seungyoon murmurs slowly. He suddenly slaps Mino's back with a laugh, "Song Mino. Your mind when you're drunk—"

Mino side-eyes him. "So. What you really needed was a chaperone here in Busan, not really a best friend. I thought it's going to be a bonding experience for the three of us."

Seungyoon lightly punches Mino's shoulder. "I'm sorry. I just needed you guys here."

Mino says nothing, letting him talk. There's a part of him that knows this to be valid, yet he needs to hear it. Maybe it'd help Mino give him up sooner.

"I just wanted you around me for the big decisions I have to make." Seungyoon continues. "My head is clearer around you because no one understands me better than my best friend. You know that. Right, Mino?"

Yes, Mino knows that very well. Too well, in fact. 

He could hate Seungyoon for being right—no one understands him better than Mino does. 

If that's so...

"Seungyoon," Mino takes a deep breath. "I have to ask..."

_Could I have been more to you?_

_Did I ever stand a chance?_

_Is it too late?_

_Will you really go back to your ex?_

"Hmmm?" Seungyoon looks at him expectantly. 

He changes his mind at the last minute. "Why is Jhae's name spelled with an extra h?"

"Are you serious? Seungyoon demands as Mino dissolves into fits of laughter. His best friend doesn't need to know the despair behind it.

**SATURDAY. 2:56 AM.**

Back at their hotel room, both lie down on separate beds; Seungyoon holds the guitar, strumming aimlessly, Mino looking up at the ceiling that seems to spin. For the hundredth time, Mino regrets drinking that last shot.

"Do you remember that time when you streaked shirtless during Club week?" Seungyoon muses.

"Don't remind me," Mino groans, recalling the incident like it was yesterday. "Pyo snuck in that fucking Moonshine. My hangover lasted three days. Never drinking that shit again." 

Seungyoon laughs. "I thought you were going to get suspended."

"And you didn't do any better than me." Mino reminds him. "You kept apologizing to everyone while Jiho-hyung and I _literally_ carried you out of the bar."

He sighs. "We really do stupid shit when we're drunk."

"Good times, though." Mino closes his eyes to stop the world from spinning, willing himself to relax. He'll be alright. Later he's coming home to Seoul to sort out his shit about everything. He just needs to get through the night.

"I'm afraid." Seungyoon says.

"Of what?"

"Of change."

Mino opens one eye. "What's going to change?"

"Everything. You're off to do your thing, and I'm off to do god-knows-what yet."

" _God-knows-what?_ Have you forgotten you're going to medical school?"

"More than anything, it feels like an excuse to do something."

Mino closes his eyes again. "Seungyoon, you're absolutely fucking extra dramatic when you're drunk."

He continues like he doesn't hear a thing. "I don't know if I want this."

"Want what?"

He doesn't answer, just continues to strum the guitar. Mino sighs, tired of drawing him out. And his head wouldn't stop spinning. 

"Nothing." Seungyoon glances over him. "You're drunk."

"You're SO drunk." Mino shoots back, his eyes still closed.

He feels Seungyoon stand up from the bed. He opens one eye and sees Seungyoon offering his guitar.

"Bathroom."

Mino gets the guitar from him, sits up straighter lest he vomits unexpectedly on Seungyoon's precious Taylor. 

Mino watches Seungyoon stumble on his way. He looks unsteady on his feet as he disappears towards the short hallway leading to the ensuite bathroom. Maybe the alcohol hit him belatedly. That's the only explanation for Seungyoon's descent into wistful retrospection.

He tries strumming the steel strings. They feel sharp against his fingertips. How can Seungyoon stand to play all day?

He hears a noise of something knocked over. Mino cranes his neck towards Seungyoon's direction. 

"You okay?" Mino calls out.

"Fine." Seungyoon answers.

Mino looks at the short corridor that leads to the bathroom. Seungyoon must be drunker than he seems. 

Later, they're going back. Another weekend gone, another chance wasted. No matter what Jiho thinks, Mino cannot bring himself to tell Seungyoon, especially now that he's thinking about rekindling things with Jhae. What can he wield against their undeniable chemistry? Or worse, history?

And the worst fact of all: It's out of his hands. It's all Seungyoon's choice.

_But is it?_ A small voice inside of him dares to protest. Y _ou really didn't give him a choice. He doesn't know about your feelings._

Another voice sneers. _And what made you think it'd make a difference?_

Mino sighs. Four years. It isn't like it's some kind of hardship to continue being friends. Maybe someday, these feelings for Seungyoon would subside to some sort of numbness that Mino can deal with, even without the aid of alcohol. 

"Mino."

He looks up and sees Seungyoon standing near the bureau where Mino had hastily stashed his things earlier. 

He's confused on why Seungyoon's face looked so, so intensely—

\--and then Mino's eyes zero in on Seungyoon's right hand.

He's holding his sketchbook.

A chill races up his spine.

Because the universe is cruel and unfair, the pages had not opened to his mindless doodles or his quick preliminary sketch for the stupid mural earlier. No. 

Seungyoon sounds vaguely apologetic, but mainly in shock. "I accidentally knocked over it on my way to—I'm sorry. The pages opened when I picked it up—"

Of course, it had opened to his drawings of Seungyoon.

Mino knows what he had just seen. 

Seungyoon holds at least a dozen pages of intensely detailed sketches of him in varying degrees of angles, poses, and emotion. The faces that Seungyoon doesn't really show to other people. 

On paper, Mino had painstakingly captured it in delicately drawn lines of Seungyoon's face, his sharp eyes, the curve of his full lips. Every aspect of him is accurately represented: the litheness and languidness of him, from his jaw, the lines of his throat, to the tension of his shoulders, always strained from carrying an invisible weight.

Mino had drawn Seungyoon as he had smiled, pouted, laughed, frowned while he was with him. 

More precisely, Mino had drawn an imprint of what it feels like when he looks at Seungyoon. 

No one can deny the intimacy of the sketches—the reason why he had never let anybody look at them. One could easily tell what and how much Mino feels about this particular subject.

Seungyoon is Mino's number one supporter of his skills, the one who knows how Mino's mind works about art. And now he knows. 

He's too brilliant not to realize what the sketches mean.

Something is about to change between them, and neither of them wants to be the first to usher it in. Already, Mino can tell that Seungyoon's mind is working in different ways on how Mino can get himself out of this. 

"So are you using me as some kind of reference for a new art thing or—"

"Seungyoon, I love you."

Seungyoon's throat works down a hard swallow. He is visibly shell-shocked to hear it from Mino in the quiet of the room.

But it doesn't even occur to Mino to deny it. Simultaneous to his terror is a growing sense of relief—finally, it's going to be over one way or another.

"How long?"

"Four years."

Seungyoon's face is still frozen. Mino could laugh, wondering if it mirrors his own.

"I didn't realize. You've never..."

"I know you didn't."

"But why didn't you ever—"

"I don't know." Mino replies softly. "We are happy as friends, aren't we?"

"Mino."

"It's enough. Truly," Mino's voice wavers slightly, with the thought of what will inevitably come after this. "So if you're thinking about getting back with Jhae, don't worry, I won't be in your way—"

"Mino."

He doesn't realize that Seungyoon had stepped closer to his space. Seungyoon's fingers gingerly wipe away the tears that Mino doesn't realize had rolled down his cheeks. 

He couldn't bear his nearness—not now. Mino catches his hand to draw it away from his face, but Seungyoon's other hand cups the back of his neck, and before he could say anything else, he crushes his mouth to Mino's for a hard kiss.

  
  


The sketchbook falls to their feet. Mino's mind whites out for a second.

His back touches the wall. Mino's arms slowly lift up on their own accord to grasp Seungyoon's lean waist.

He thinks he knows everything about Seungyoon—and his last coherent thought is that there's no good reason for him to be a good kisser. He had never been kissed so breathless in his entire god-almighty life. He fits against him perfectly, molding flawlessly against him. 

This is the cruelest kind of joke, to find out that the best kisser he's ever had is his best friend, and after this, when they come apart for air, could they honestly just only be friends? 

Could anyone simply be friends who _kiss_ like this? Could Mino bear going back to what they were after knowing this fact?

Seungyoon's hand trails over his shoulders, down to his sides, and up under his shirt. His dry, chapped palm slides over his ribs and Mino breaks away his mouth to gasp, but Seungyoon is having none of that—he tilts Mino's chin and angles his jaw to press his lips harder onto him. Mino can almost taste the desperation off his tongue.

Desperation for what? Mino's mind is hazy, but something gnaws at the edges of his consciousness, that one that states something is terribly wrong.

And just as it had quickly started, so it ends abruptly—Seungyoon roughly pushes him back to the wall and turns his face away, his shoulders heaving deeply.

Mino is breathless himself, and he finds the presence of mind to bring his shirt down again.

Seungyoon is eerily quiet. For once, Mino cannot tell what his best friend is thinking. 

But he says the last thing that Mino would ever think of him uttering:

_"Mino. I'm sorry."_

And with those three words, Seungyoon walks towards the door and, without another glance, leaves the room. Leaves him.

Mino stares at the space where Seungyoon had vacated. 

The sketchbook's page lies open on the carpeted floor. He picks it up. 

It's a quick sketch of Seungyoon taking a photo from a distance. His lens had been aimed at his direction, so Mino had taken advantage of the angle. As always, when Seungyoon directs his attention at him, he is momentarily dazzled by the brightness.

And after that searing brightness, it always fades to black. 

  
  


**SUNDAY. 8:56 AM**

"I thought we had a connection."

Jiho is dejected as he picks at his breakfast set. He is dressed impeccably, but his hair is devoid of any hairstyling--a sure sign that Jiho must be in distress. It appears he isn't the only one who had a disastrous evening.

However, Mino remains quiet. His own food looks unappealing as fuck, but he devours it, refusing to give in.

"I've never felt anything like that." Jiho murmurs. 

Mino doesn't say anything. Jiho doesn't even notice--he just drones on, monotonous.

"I thought the feeling was mutual." He sniffs. "I knew it was."

Mino hates that there is a full five seconds where he had thought the same. But could anyone even blame him? What had happened in the hotel room was an avalanche. One minute they were talking, the next minute they were--

The fork spears the shiny sphere of the egg yolk. Mino continues to eat. 

"She left me without a backward glance."

Mino can still remember the hostile click of the heavy door automatically locking after Seungyoon left. 

Out of everything last night, Mino hates the fact that he had confessed rashly. He had one job--get through this weekend without fucking things up. 

Jiho looks up at Mino, eyes defeated. "Don't you think that's cruel, Mino?

It is then that Mino sees Jhae outside the lobby cafe, looking fresh from a shower. Seungyoon appears behind him. Mino waits for their eyes to meet, but Seungyoon walks straight outside to get a table out by the beach. Jhae sits in front of him, and they study their menus, chatting easily.

"Yes, I agree, hyung," Mino replies, answering Jiho. "It's cruel."

**SUNDAY. 9:11 AM.**

"I'm so glad that you guys were able to come." Jhae smiles gratefully at Seungyoon. "The event wasn't that much of a success, but with you guys here, I still had fun."

He returns his smile. "That's good."

"I'm happy that we saw each other before graduation."

"Same here."

Jhae picks up the tiny teaspoon to stir his black coffee. Stalling, Seungyoon knows.

"Got plans next weekend?" Jhae asks cheerfully.

Seungyoon can't help but smile. "You know I don't plan that far ahead."

"But you're really applying for medical school?" He asks as if to confirm.

"Uh huh." Seungyoon thinks about how everyone had asked him if he really was applying and thinks, _maybe I really am a fickle bastard._

"Seungyoon." He looks up alertly to Jhae's change of tone. "I have to ask…"

"Hmm?"

"What's up with you and Mino?"

Here it comes. "What do you mean?"

"Who's he in your life?"

Seungyoon had forgotten how intense Jhae's stares are. Seungyoon had once basked in that intensity, simultaneously addicted and flattered to be the object of his attentions. 

A sliver of memory from last night seeps in his mind. He immediately locks it away. Not yet.

The answer to Jhae's question is more complicated than he had thought. Seungyoon decides to tell the simplest truth.

"Mino is my best friend. My best friend for four years."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... i'm sorry?


End file.
